on the other side of the stage

been moving through life mostly defined by the negatives. only remember the bad things they say. embodied it. encumbered.

conversations with people say otherwise. they remember my advice, critiques of systemic issues, words with weight. words i've long forgotten i said, but believe could have come from me.

i used to not understand performers talking about their haters. i liked these performers. i never understood it, they're doing great, why give haters the air time?

but having had haters myself, i start to remember the people i looked up to actually had them too. people that disagreed with them. people that simply just disliked their very existence. i can imagine it must weigh on them to go through each day carrying the burden of continuing to do what fuels the hate. believing in something that others don't see.

but then there are people like me that saw their worth.

and just like the people who remember the good things i've said, i need to be like them.

i mustn't forget to be a fan of myself.