celestial consistency

i can never trust myself to be consistent. 

there's a lot of conflicting states in me. i believe they're all valid at the time of manifestation. there's the obvious example of: i carry compassion one moment, then i could get fucked over and then cut ties altogether. so it's a response to an external stimulus. but there are also instances where the inconsistency comes from within - like not having thought things through, or being at the mercy of misfiring neurotransmitters.

when things get uncomfortable, i wish to channel the courage that my past self that threw himself into the situation. he thoughtlessly jumps in, and i live with the aftermath. yeah, i'm flawed like that. that has been a recurring pattern. i don't like having my personality determined by the stars, but i definitely embody aries energy.

with all the chaos cooking in me, i barely get a grasp of who i am.

well, at least the zodiac keeps people consistent with templated traits.

maybe they're onto something.

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