positive detachment

i should be relieved.

i don't have to keep my hair short. i can get on with my life without anyone who doesn't respect my way of doing things.

i don't have to be forced to ask anyone if they've eaten already - y'know what that's such a stupid concept. people whom you have to be concerned about eating are irresponsible idiots that can't take care of themselves.

i don't have to endure an unengaging companionship as if I'm monologuing to a deaf mute who doesn't even know sign language. i could squeeze out better conversations with grab drivers.

i don't have to introduce myself to her parents as "hey, you might remember me last year for being the guy that you wanted to send to jail, and oh yeah, i'm now also the guy that got your daughter pregnant"

i don't have to obsess over my cash flow to make sure that she gives birth properly. corollary to that, i don't even have to think of spending money to raise the kid anymore. i mean she has that covered, she has a sugar daddy anyway.

i don't have to worry about having an unfaithful partner. data shows that infidelity is the number 1 cause for divorce. and thank satan i don't have to go through a messy annulment case. all i have to do is to simply stonewall the shit out of her.

credit where it's due, i felt happiest with her, but logically, that's the result of effort justification from all the cognitive dissonance.

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