transluency

my girlfriend had asked me to be more transparent with her. which indicates that i'm a shady guy. quite funny really. it's by choice that i don't open up to her as much because i feel that i bore the hell out of her when i open up about things that matter to me.

i don't necessarily look down on her level of intellect, in fact i put in high regard, however i simply don't feel my shit is worth her time. ironic really cause i have for the longest time been the guy that tries to adapt to other people's interests. in most cases, i always come into any interaction with open interest to whatever the other person has to say. i guess what i find lacking about my girlfriend is her lack of insight when i open up about my passions. i appreciate that there is a warm recognition of the value it brings to her, but it feels pretty patronizing to be on the receiving end of that.

while i find those interactions with her generally lacking, my estimation of her doesn't diminish in any way. i'm well aware of how limited we all are. i have an abundance of loving consideration of the things she does best, the things she can't do well but is trying to be, and the things she'll never become.

and it's all gonna be fine because settling down has its perks

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