self awareness

i struggle to write recently. 

now i understand why some writing feels forced. that's what i'm going through right now. i'm forcing myself to put out something. i've since learned the shortcuts people use. templates help, rehashing the same sentences help, blatant copy pasting help. i still don't want an easy way out.

i'd rather read than write. i've been trying to refill my knowledge base. i somehow lost my love for learning. i was getting by with facing different people and repeating the same nuggets of wisdom over and over again.

and now i can see that i've been making the mistake of settling with an easy way out when presenting myself to the world.

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