man on fire

a week detached from the incident, perhaps my first aid countermeasures will start losing its efficacy.

i have to start weaning myself from reliving the past both good and bad, i have to start reducing my ruminations on the what ifs and why nots, i have to start minimizing my needless anticipation of future fears.

however, i wouldn't put it past my subconscious mind to suddenly inject intrusive thoughts out of nowhere. there will be triggers, i know. but i'll have to get out of this protective bubble one way or another. because we can't move forward until we haven't come to terms with our new normal.

but i am still unequivocally and unapologetically furious. i've never been to this level - this is way above boiling or melting point.

in my previous relationship, i was weak and vulnerable, thinking that i could depend on the love of my partner as someone i could lean on. but now, the cudgels i have to carry on my own. the universe sure has its way of always leading me somewhere i should i always be

because finally, i'm in my true element.

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